Scott Zolak refused to do my show, but he demanded I have no guest. As he seems like a cool guy, I obliged. This ep is a solo joint. I start the show with some chit chat about mediation, as last week's episode with Brendan Sagalow motivated me to start doing it. I chat about weeping in hot yoga, my favorite Maryland Terp t-shirt, and how my recent doctors visits are making me feel like a fat RoboCop. I also yell at the audience to go to therapy, talk about poor people tearing their ACL's, and do a quick bit on Atlanta Falcons backup Turk Schonert.
Am I doing the episode summary right? I feel like previous ones I didn't write enough, now I'm writing too much. Whatever, this one will just be over-written, we'll see what happens on the next episode description. Moving on...I also talk about psychos watching me sleep, hugging Drew Bledsoe, Scott Zolak being a fun guy, Scott Zolak having terrible college numbers, Scott Zolak reminding me of Koy Detmer, and the Patriots-Jaguars 1998 playoff game.
I feel like I'm committed to this style for the rest of the way here, but in case it's annoying to you, don't worry, I think this is a one-off. You don't need to hear EVERYTHING I talked about. Anyway, then I talked about Giovanni Carmazzi being fearful, being an enabler, my recent appearance on The Schmidt Scharing Show, yelling at that Geico commerical, Jack Bauer cutting off a terrorist's nutsack, making Coldstone employees sing and pit bulls.
Still reading? I close the podcast by talking for too long about the Oprah interview with Harry and Meghan, Woody Allen, having kids, and encouraging people to check out my merch, newsletter and Patreon waiting list. Also, follow my friend Rob Stern, he dropped in for a quick comedy bit. Alright, we made it. That sucked. I will never write a episode summary like this again, unless this gets a ton of listens, in which case it'll be like this forever.